Friday Funnies

I have a whole list of nominees for this week's Friday Funnies, and believe me I'll get to them all, but I will also most likely throw a bunch of them into Idiot of the Day posts, because they could easily overlap. This one is good not just for the sheer funniness of the missed goal (bad enough as it is) but to listen to two Canadian-sounding guys mock him for it.

Idiot of the Day

When Kelly and I went and saw The Pains of Being Pure at Heart in concert a few weeks back, we got there early enough to check out the opening act. I don't remember the band's name off the top of my head, nor am I going to hunt it down on the Internet because, frankly, they sucked. I mean REALLY sucked. Donald Trump hairstyle level of sucking. OK, it was probably worse than that.

In any case, the real reason I posted this is because of the band's bass player. At the start of the show, he was donning a letterman's jacket from either a high school or a college or something. I could have cared less, until three songs in he took it off to reveal the main portion of his on-stage attire:

A shiny, teal wife beater.

Oh yeah, it was frickin' laaaaame looking. If the letterman's jacket was some kind of clue to his outfit being a costume, I missed the point of it altogether. What I didn't miss was Kelly, Mike R., Mel B and I cracking awful jokes about him long after the shitty music of their's ended and the had left the stage. Note to rock band members: Don't wear metallic teal wife beaters. It's not going to get you laid, and that is the singular reason you are in your band to begin with. Idiot.

Idiot of the Day

This one, sadly, goes to my former employer, SHNS. The first winner of the Scripps National Spelling Bee died, and of course, leave it to them to fudge the headline. In case they've already corrected it, here's a screenshot as proof.

Idiot of the Day

Do I feel sorry for this girl? Nope.

Do I secretly fear this will happen to my brother? Yep.

So note to Michael: Chill out with the walking/talking/driving/eating/sleeping/whatever while texting. Danger, Will Robinson, danger!