My Damn Deer

One of the trials of living in Takoma Park is dealing with wildlife. In just three years of living here, we have (on continual occasions) seen squirrels, raccoons, mice, deer and foxes traipsing through our yard.

Drives me nuts. Because let's be honest, Kelly may call my neighborhood Middle-Earth because he can't imagine anyone going more than five blocks for anything in the city, but it's not like I live in pure farmland. I actually live closer to a Metro station than any of my friends (except Douglass) so it's insane that I have to listen to raccoons fighting with the foxes at night over who gets to setup shop in my backyard (hint: the raccoons won and the foxes now live about six houses down).

These damn deer are just up to no good. We had to build a makeshift deer fence (OK, the wife's cousin made it ... he's smart like that) just to keep the damn things from treating our garden like the Blue Boar buffet line. Just the other week, the wife's uncle and aunt came to DC for a visit and I showed him this video that I took a couple days prior in our backyard.



I'm just glad I didn't become this guy. See, the damn deer doesn't give a shit about me walking about 11 feet away from it. It's Honey Badger Deer for all I know. I showed him that video, and his eyes lit up. Her uncle's an avid hunter. He may be a board-certified spinal surgeon during the day, but by golly he saw that deer on the video and said, "Hell at that range I wouldn't even need to use bullets. I could just beat it death with barrel." I think he is exploring real estate options in our neighborhood as we speak.