Bye, Bye Banks ... Until Another Day

One of my best photo experiences ever coincided with being in NYC and shooting one of my favorite things to watch, skateboarding. Kelly and I went to NYC a couple years ago and went with Eric to the Brooklyn Banks, this kickass spot under the Brooklyn Bridge that is a mecca for skaters. I got some great shots (though Kelly hates many of the ones I took of him because he never nailed things the way he wanted to) and you can check them out here.

Sadly, it looks like the Banks are going away for awhile. I caught this story online and got a little sad. They are making some improvements and fixes to the Brooklyn Bridge, and they have to close off the Banks in order to do it. Just had to take a moment and acknowledge the Banks for the sweet skate spot that it is, and hopefully one day I'll be back up there to photograph Kelly landing a tre flip or something.

Friday Funnies

A couple weeks ago Kelly was sent a link to a recut trailer to The Shining, in which it makes the movie look like a G-rated Disney flick. I told him that many moons ago I had found what I thought was the originator of this trend. He instantly wanted to see it, and I forgot to send him the link, so instead, here it is. I give you, Sleepless in Seattle: The Horror Movie.



Now wasn't that fun? Of course, it doesn't stop there. And no doubt the wife's friend Mandy would be appalled at the recutting of what she claims is the greatest movie of all time, the horrendous You've Got Mail.

Greening My Mother: Gettin Clean

My mom's been doing lots of things to improve her eco footprint, but there's no shame in nagging her about more things she can do. Plus, most of the time it's not me nagging her; I just need an excuse to talk about more things I've learned and what better way to do it than point the finger at her. One of the focal points I've been researching and trying to improve upon is cleaning products. The two main ones I will discuss right now are shampoos and laundry detergents.

For the shampoos, I proudly plunked down the money to get Aveda's Pure-Formance Shampoo. It's one of seven Aveda products to earn the coveted Cradle2Cradle certification, and achieving that is, as Ron Burgundy would say, kind of a big deal. I previously tried some other "organic" and "all-natural" shampoos that lacked a lot of man-made chemicals and animal testing and all that stuff, but they just weren't working. Aveda has always been a rock-solid company in terms of trying to achieve a better balance of materials and impact and such, so it's cool to support them when they get a rating like this, plus it's a men's product, which is also a bonus considering 99% of stuff out there is clearly geared toward the ladies.

Moving on to laundry detergents, this one has always been a tenuous subject in the household. We do a decent job of air drying some of our clothes to reduce how much we use the dryer (because, shockingly, oxygen does a decent job drying things). But I've been pissed about how there should be a better way to clean your clothes without dumping Tide's chemical-heavy gel into a washer. And thankfully, the fine folks at Method figured it out. This stuff is made using 95% natural and renewable ingredients and the packaging is awesome. Since it's concentrated, the tube uses a third less plastic than traditional tubs of detergent, and 50% of the plastic used is recycled, so it's winning on all fronts (the fact that it takes up a ton less room in your closet is a big plus on its own). And best of all for us, they make a fragrance-free version because the wife has crazy allergies to traditional detergents.

At some point I'm going to start checking out soaps and other cleaning products. I'll let you know as I discover more.

Friday Funnies

This has been around for years, but damn it makes me laugh every time. The good folks at Robot Chicken made a uber-long stop-motion movie based on all the Star Wars films. It's damn funny, is all I will say. This is just one scene from the movie, but I highly encourage you to scour the interwebs and watch the whole thing.

'robot chicken star wars' Papa Palpatine @ Yahoo! Video

The Female Dickey

So on the tube the other night pops up this commercial that made me laugh and feel uncomfortable for the "actors" who have to star in this commercial. My joy in watching this TV spot was as boundless ...



First off, this is quickly entering the pantheon of hilarious infomercials. How many takes do you think that office guy asked for to get the "awkwardly staring at her breasts" look juuuuust right? 20? 50? Plus, I watched the scene a few too many times and started wondering what the dynamic is. Because she's sitting at a desk with lots of leather-bound books and oak furniture, so is she the boss that has the uber-creepy assistant? What kind of profession is she in that she gets a full office but just now realized it might be a bad idea to show off the boobs to co-workers? I'm captivated by the thoughts of what this office must be like. Or, what was the casting process like ("Uh, yes, we're looking for large boobs and someone who doesn't mind a stranger staring at them and you have no lines." Sold!) And, yes, I have re-watched this commercial too many times, but damn it's funny.

And the script is classic. For instance, they even worked in a frickin rhyme into the commercial:

You love the low-cut top for going out at night,
But in the office it’s just not right.
You’ve tried safety pins but they leave holes and just look wrong.
And with a camisole you end up tugging and adjusting all day long!

Don't think Charlie Kaufman was writing that up. More than anything, I was shocked that this camisole thing was such a problem that it required a dickey to fix it. After bringing up this commercial to women I know and trust to not slap me, they in fact agreed that this situation is real and something like this makes a modicum of sense, even if the construction and product itself looks like it costs about -$.05 to make. Just never thought women had this kind of problem, or else why would they wear them (of course, that then opens up a whole door to high heels, pantyhose and whatever else).

Anyway, this commercial made me laugh for the longest time, and then I got real mad because I was fearing that this Cami Secret thing would try and trump the greatest Dickey of all time, and then relaxed knowing it could never beat Cousin Eddie.

Getting Back in the Groove

Well, it had to happen eventually. I was getting fed up with not getting enough running in, and after several months of not getting out there enough, it was time to hit the pavement and start getting back into running shape.

About a month ago, I found my motivation. The Takoma Park 5K (comically called the TKPK5K) was coming up, and that was all the motivation I needed. Well, it also helped that the entry fee was super cheap, the race took place 4 blocks from my house and after all that I have been through in the past weeks, having the fees go toward helping students have safer routes to school was all in my wheelhouse.

I hopped back on the treadmill and found that I was way out of shape from my normal rhythm. In my prime of high school, I was running around 7:30 minute miles. Not great, but not shabby either. Up until about two years, ago, I was sitting comfortably around 10-minute miles. Not great, but I'll take it. I'm not looking to break records, just finish and keep the ol ticker in good health. When I got on the treadmill about 45 days ago, it was rough. 12-minute miles. Damn, I felt like an 80-year-old up there. But screw it, I'm not gonna get all that normal pace back in 45 days, so I reluctantly decided to suck it up and just do it. So I ran a few times a week and got myself back into a comfortable pace.

Today was the race. I talked the wife into running it with me, though she has the knees of 120-year-old, and she's much better suited for biking and other aerobics; she's just not a runner. In any case, we ran it, and it went better than I expected. I finished in 35:51, which was 11:30 minute miles. And best of all, we had to stop three times to give the wife's knees a break. I think if she wasn't holding me back (heheheeheee, she'll love that), I think I could have hit around 10:30 minute miles without trouble. So I'm getting back into the game, and for now I'm thinking I can get to maybe 9:30 minute miles if I stay with it.

So I need to keep it up and stay in the game. And, I need to get the wife to run one more with me, because she beat me today and I can't let that stand! (OK, she admits that I let her win, but I'm proud of her for gutting it out and not letting that woman we passed catch up to us in the final sprint).

Friday Funnies

Two bits of bad news I got Thursday. 1) Steve Carrell says that next season is most likely his last on The Office. 2) Paramount, in all their infinite wisdom, passed on making Anchorman 2. Because the first one was total shit. Of course. Anyway, to make myself feel better, here is a collection of Carrell's bits as the mentally retarded lamp lover, Brick Tamlind.

Don't Be Frightened

Tonight I'm going to see one of my favorite bands live. I got into Frightened Rabbit about three years ago when my buddy Dan gave me one of their albums. I've been hooked on them ever since and since they are a Scottish band, the times when they actually come over to the U.S. are rare for sure. So when I found out they were coming to DC, I went apeshit trying to find tickets because by the time I learned about the show it was sold out.

No matter, I could not be deterred. I got tickets, and Dr. Dan and I are checking them out tonight. I have high expectations, and I won't settle for anything less than total ass-kickery. You've been put on notice, Rabbits of Frightenedness. Don't disappoint me. For you all who want a taste of the goodness, check out this video for their sweet athiest-tic tome, Head Rolls Off.

My Music Project

I have a ton of CDs. I love music, and listen to it all the time. I'm pretty much game for anything except for that shitty-ass country music that makes me want to kick a twangy-singing fool in the throat. And since my very first CD that I bought way back in the early 90s, I've grown to have quite a stable of CDs and all the plastic jewel cases they come in. And let's be honest, I have not purchased a CD in about 4-5 years because of this thing called the Internet and Bittorrent and stuff that makes "sharing" music with friends and family a helluva lot easier than paying $18 for a plastic coaster with 11 tracks on it.

But now I've taken the fight back to the CDs. After the holidays, each weekend I took a couple hours and burned CDs to my laptop. Just a few here and there while watching TV or just being the lazy slob I sometimes turn into on Sunday mornings. Well, about three weeks ago I finally finished. Couldn't believe it, but it was done. Everything from my massive Aerosmith collection to the highly suspect music options I gained when moving in with the wife. I'm not without my own questionable CD purchases from back in the day (a few too many 80s collections and others I won't mention ... but at least there's no Neil Diamond), but I'm blaming most of the suspect music on her. It's better that way, I think.

One of the best side effects to this whole project has been rediscovering music that I used to love and forgot all about. Like how funny 20 years later some of my Weird Al Yankovic songs still are. Or the memories from my childhood of my mom cleaning the house to Billy Joel's "Innocent Man" and MJ's "Thriller" and playing them until the songs were beaten into my head for all time. Or the albums that I used to think were good but were shamefully awful, awful, awful (I'm looking at you, Phish, Telsa and Pitchshifter). Then it's nice to rediscover music from college when we used to throw crazy-ass parties and listen to Prince, Run-DMC, Radiohead, KRS-ONE and stuff until the cops came.

Everything is now digital, and it's on a small portable hard drive that I have access to just about whenever. It's great for space saving, considering the drive fits in my pocket and still has room for plenty more albums to be added in. I've got another 200 GBs or so in leftover space and so I'll be adding more as things come in (like the new Animal Collective or The National or if Aerosmith continues to make albums until they're 118 years old). All-in-all, I have 260 artists and more than 400 CDs on that hard drive, and it's a very satisfying feeling seeing it all done. All the CDs are not gone from my house yet. They're now collecting dust on an unused shelf in the basement and the space we save upstairs looks nicer than 8 shelves of plastic shit just sitting there unused. Plus, someday when I feel confident about the state of things, I'll recycle all the CDs and feel better about that contribution to the green movement instead of just throwing them away. So everyone wins.

My Monday Night

By now those close to me know that something really awful happened to me Monday night. For legal reasons it's best, for now, that I don't give any opinions about it. So for the time being, those who want to know what happened, here is a link to the police report.