My Childhood, Bastardized

Holy crap, I'm gonna have to start a whole new blog purely dedicated to all the ways Hollywood is screwing around with my childhood in the present day. Previously I've discussed the Karate Kid remake, the new Robin Hood movie and even older topics like the GI Joe movie and Transformers. Today's desecration of my childhood: the new A-Team movie.

Oh yeah, the jackasses in Hollywood, ever starving to make a quick buck, have taken a once-beloved 80s TV show and turned it into a crazy lunatic fringe of a movie. I have fond memories of the A-Team, most notably thinking George Peppard was the coolest leader a group of renegades convicted of a crime they didn't commit could have. Soldiers of fortune, what a great line. I had the truck and my Mr. T action figures and Face and all the team. They didn't rank about Transformers or the Joes, but they were a solid TV crew and they were real actors, not cartoons, so that gave them some extra cache for me. Much like The Greatest American Hero. Yeah, I think we're starting to see a pattern of why I sucked as a student from age 6 and beyond.

Even at my old job at SHNS, we laughed at the A-Team. I'd play the theme song anytime Sheila would get pissed at someone because she needed to hear that gunfire and that corny theme song. Good times. Now, they'll probably have Justin Timberlake do a hip hop version of it and it will sound like ass.

So here's the trailer to the movie. Looks rather dumb to me, especially when you throw in gratuitous naked Bradley Cooper just for the ladies to think this movie might have some appeal to them (trust me, ladies, it won't). And I don't give a crap how popular that IFC/MMA bullshit is, Quentin Jackson is no Mr. T and that is just a shame. Don't get me started on Liam Neeson replacing George Peppard. I weep for lo George. He was cool.

First, the original:


Now, the remake: