Man Card Member, No. 404431

I can never say no to a grilling challenge. I will freak out during all the prep and cooking, but when it comes out good I will sigh a huge sigh of relief and then typically relish in my victory over the food. And then I also devour it like the Fantastic Mr. Fox family.

I've always been intrigued by the idea of the Beer Can Chicken, but some people either told me it was way too rednecky to bother with, or it didn't turn out all that great anyway, so what was the point? I have not grilled chicken all that often, so this was something I figured I should try.

Remarkably, it's easy as hell. You literally rub the chicken down with some kind of dry rub (we used some tasty, spicy rub I have from The Salt Lick outside Austin) and the shove a beer can up it's arse. (Weird side note: The recipe calls for the beer can to be only half full, and it said to just pour out half the beer. Pour it out? Are you high? That's damn fine Guinness there, sir. I proudly drank it, like a real man should.) Heat up the grill, throw some smoke chips in for color and flavor, and that's it. Grill for about 90 minutes and holy damn if that chicken doesn't have fantastic flavor and meat that actually falls off the bone like other BS artists advertise. So yeah, man card awarded for conquering fire, meat and doing something goofy like shoving a beer can up a dead animal's ass and cooking it. Only a man would think of something so stupid but successful.

Idiot of the Day

When Kelly and I went and saw The Pains of Being Pure at Heart in concert a few weeks back, we got there early enough to check out the opening act. I don't remember the band's name off the top of my head, nor am I going to hunt it down on the Internet because, frankly, they sucked. I mean REALLY sucked. Donald Trump hairstyle level of sucking. OK, it was probably worse than that.

In any case, the real reason I posted this is because of the band's bass player. At the start of the show, he was donning a letterman's jacket from either a high school or a college or something. I could have cared less, until three songs in he took it off to reveal the main portion of his on-stage attire:

A shiny, teal wife beater.

Oh yeah, it was frickin' laaaaame looking. If the letterman's jacket was some kind of clue to his outfit being a costume, I missed the point of it altogether. What I didn't miss was Kelly, Mike R., Mel B and I cracking awful jokes about him long after the shitty music of their's ended and the had left the stage. Note to rock band members: Don't wear metallic teal wife beaters. It's not going to get you laid, and that is the singular reason you are in your band to begin with. Idiot.

What I've Read: Earth

One of the benefits of being mauled financially by the IRS is it gives you tons of opportunities to do free things, like read books. And I'm on a tear this last month. My most recent conquest, the planet Earth. Well, at least, Earth as explained by the staff of The Daily Show.

If you're familiar with The Daily Show, you can imagine and almost anticipate a lot of the jokes and where the narrative thread goes in this book. It's intended as a reference guide for aliens who arrive on Earth after the human race is extinct, save for some traces of human DNA in Sweden and New Mexico.

The book surmises everything that has happened in most of human history but from a 10,000 foot level. It cracks wise about culture, religion, politics, society, the sexes, the continents and the ecosystem. Some things are just touched on briefly while others have a bit more bite. If I was surprised by anything, it's the occasional curse word that's thrown in. I'm so used to them being bleeped out on TV that to read the words and imagine them being said by the personalities is kinda strange.

The book is also a lot shorter and much faster read than I imagined, so plowing through it in a week should pose little problem to the common person, and makes me wonder whether reading the America book also written by the TDS staff is worth getting. This means it's got to be an even quicker read for you normal folk, since I have the reading and retention capacity of a garden gnome. As a bonus, the book also made HuffPo's list of 9 Books to Read for Earth Day 2011. So that was a pleasant bonus to discover last Friday as I finished it on the train ride to work.

Earth Day 2011

I've become a steady follower of 350.org, and when they absorbed local 1Sky into their network, I was sad to see a voice get absorbed into a larger body but excited nonetheless for 1Sky to get some much-deserved love from the climate community. Anywho ... last weekend was PowerShift conference here in DC, and while I was unable to attend, a lot of the content was put online, including this awesome speech by Bill McKibben.

Earth Day 2011

It's Earth Day, which means your favorite eco-preferred person (that would be me) is going to share some links and videos on things we can do to help protect this mortal coil we call home. First up, a cool animated short about water. Oh, and it's narrated by Kristen Bell, who's hot. So that helps.



And I gave my $20. You should, too.

Friday Funnies

A clip from one of my favorite journalism movies, Broadcast News. Great cast (Albert Brooks and the always fantastic Holly Hunter) and is a poignant satire of an industry I once wanted to be a member of. Then I went to college and saw what a joke TV news was, and wisely left it ... for clearly superior and financially stable newspaper field.

What I've Read: Sex, Drugs and Cocoa Puffs

Now this is some writing I can get behind. I found Chuck Klosterman through listening to the BS Report. Simmons had him on several years ago to talk about sports and pop culture and I latched onto him quickly as someone I'd love to have a conversation with about just about everything but someone I also knew I could never have a dialogue with because I'm a total moron by comparison.

This was his third book in a series of five that he has written, all a collection of essays about life, politics, music, pop culture and the like. I was particularly fond of the essays on Saved by the Bell, another on the Real World, his explanation of the Empire Strikes Back and then his breakdown of Tom Cruise. It's all good stuff.

What I really like about his writing and style is that I don't always agree with everything, but he frames his arguments and questions in such compelling ways that even the most minute of topics has some sort of relevance. I think it also helps that he was born in 1972, which makes him only a few years older than me, so these topics he discusses shaped me the same way they shaped him. Makes it more personal for me instead of trying to relate to essays from journalists or pop culture writers who are a generation or more removed from me.

For anyone born in the '70s, this is someone you should definitely give a chance to. The moment I finished the fourth chapter, I instantly went online and bought the other four books he's written. They should arrive next week and I can't wait to dig in.

Game On: Week of April 15

My most recent column, where I reviewed MLB 11: The Show, MLB 2K11 and The 3rd Birthday. Hat tip to the Seattle Times for publishing.

Friday Funnies

You wanna see how quickly a moment can devolve into madness? Try playing a round of golf and have one hole turn into a living hell. This is what happened to Kevin Na on the 9th hole yesterday.

This is sad to watch, and painful in a Michael Scott in a HR seminar, but I can laugh at this because I play golf and anyone who has played golf has been in a situation like this at least once. Granted, I never had a hole go so bad that I scored a 16 on it, but then again I don't get paid to play golf, so he'll probably get over it and get his check next week wherever he plays. But still, a 16. Damn. Maybe someone should have spotted him a Hladky Double.

Damn, a 16. And I love the caddie, always in abject fear that Na was going to flip out at hit him with a ball. When I was first playing golf in grade school, I once hit my friend Aaron with a golf ball, but it was more his fault for walking 60 yards in front of me while I was hitting, which was a stupid thing to do. As for Na, I was honestly surprised he didn't snap a club in anger.

What I've Read: New Rules: Polite Musings from a Timid Observer

I enjoy Bill Maher's weekly show, and while I don't always catch every episode, I follow along with the show and catch clips here and there and watch the interviews if there are particularly interesting people I want to hear from or political events that I want to hear his thoughts on.

I got a recommendation to read his New Rules book, and I gotta say, boy did it suck. I'm not saying it was a total waste of time, but I think I had different expectations of what the book was going to be. I get that it was a brief musings and some one-off statements (many taken from his previous episodes as a kind of compilation). Maybe I was in a weird head space that week, but the book just did absolutely nothing for me. I think I need to pick up an old Carlin or Franken book to get some better chuckles and more interesting insights. Granted, I'll also admit to not knowing the book was nearly five years old, but once I discovered that and tried to enjoy his insights and thoughts from a current-day lens, it still wasn't all that great. Bleh, onto something else.

Idiot of the Day

How this guy has not shattered every ligament in his knees astounds me. I bet Kelly could do this, though. He's wicked flexible.

Game On: Week of April 8

Here is my most recent column, where I reviewed a slew of Nintendo 3DS games: Super Street Fighter IV: 3D Edition, Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon: Shadow Wars, Nintendogs + Cats and Steel Diver. Thanks to the Seattle Times for publishing.

My Night with Toad

Tonight I'm getting in the Delorean and going back in time to hear one of my favorite bands of my youth.

Back in grade school I really got into Toad the Wet Sprocket. Like most people, I first heard them through their song All I Want, which was OK, but once I got the album it was filled with several other much better tracks. Hell, I liked them so much that I can admit to using one of their song lyrics in our 8th grade graduation book. We were supposed to only submit one lyric that we liked, but I wanted two, and since I was creating the graduation book as part of a class, I cheated. So alongside an Aerosmith lyric (of course), I used a Toad lyric, "Whatever happens will be." Wow, wasn't I deep at the tender age of 13? At least it was better than a couple other people's bullshit usage of Poison or Boyz II Men. Idiots.

Since then I bought every album and was bummed when they broke up. Never got to see them live, and I figured that was the end of it. They got back together, briefly, early in the aughts but I didn't hear about it until after it happened, which was a damn shame. Luckily they decided to get back together (again ... they like to break up and get back together A LOT ... kinda like UofL fans), and once I heard about the show I was first in line (well, online) to buy tickets.

I've got a setlist in my head of what I hope they play, but I'll just be happy to see them, and maybe hope they stay together long enough to make a new album.

Friday Funnies

Among the long list of movies that I will gladly turn on and watch at any time, I have been pleasantly addicted to Away We Go for several years. The wife and I saw it and between the humor, the sadness and and all that's in between delivered by some of our favorite actors working, it's just a great movie all around.

And as I said, it has some great humor. I'm not going to spoil some of the best scenes in case you haven't seen it yet (let's just say Maggie Gyllenhaal plays this hilarious character my wife thinks is her real-life persona). But here are two good ones, both featuring actresses we love: Alison Janney and Catherine O'Hara.

Trailer Love

This trailer is too damn funny. Even if it's not actually real. But with all the winks and nods to the original "Harry met Sally" movie, and the fantastic appearance by Tyson, and you can't go wrong here.

Game On: Week of April 1

My most recent column, in which in reviewed Crysis 2 and Homefront. A big tip of the hat to two of the publishers of the column. First, to the Globe Gazette in Mason City, Iowa. And then, in a pleasant surprise, the Red Deer Advocate in Alberta, Canada. Oh yea, gone international. Sweet.

My Night with a Pure Heart

Tonight I'm checking out a band I'm a fan of, The Pains of Being Pure at Heart. I honestly don't know how I found out about this band, but I think they were one of those "People who like this album also like these ..." recs from Amazon when I was browsing for some new music last year. Anyway, I got their first album, loved it, and have their other two albums as well. Should be a great show, plus I'm convinced Kelly and I will easily be the oldest dudes there.

Friday Funnies

I admit to never watching the Dana Carvey Show when it was actually airing. What can I say, it only aired during the spring of '96 and I was probably really drunk and whatnot in college, and in my sophomore year I was most likely only watching The Daily Show, sports and playing video games. Hmmm, much like my life now. Damn.

Anyway, I've been discovering clips here and there from the show, and I was a big fan of Carvey's work on SNL. So here's a good bit they did about Gerald Ford dying.