What I've Watched: Vantage Point

I can barely contain myself. This movie is the essence of putrid. And it's exactly the kind of movie that speaks to all of Hollywood's ills.

The lack of originality is stunning in Hollywood sometimes. Vantage Point is actually a remake, and though I have never seen the original, I sure as shit ain't seeing it now, because even if it's better than this version, I don't have the stomach for it.

Back when I was a kid, we visited my grandparent's house in NJ and I distinctly remember watching Down and Out in Beverly Hills, an '80s "comedy" that my grandfather, aunts, uncles, parents and the two dogs all considered to be the worst movie we'd ever seen. Even to this day, if just bringing up Down and Out gives my mom the shivers.

I told her flatly that Vantage Point was the Down and Out of the new millennium. Without two breaths, she said, "Screw it, send it back to Netflix, I'm not even going to bother watching it." Holy cow, that tells you something. You send a movie back without even bothering, because I compared it to a horrid film from two decades ago. That's the power of the Down and Out label in the Campbell household.

I feel sorry for any fool who spent money to see that movie in the theater. If you didn't figure out the whole thing and who the bad guys are in about 4 minutes into the film, you should have your brain checked. Big budget, big-name cast, big production, complete lack of effort. Thanks to Sigourney, Forrest, Dennis, Matthew and everyone else who crapped the bed on this one. Hope that new door you bought with this paycheck was worth it.