Friday Funnies

I'm still basking in the glow of last year's national title, while my good buddy Luke has seemingly forgotten that we won the big trophy last year (and beat Louisville on the way to doing it, no less). Can't complain about anything really.

But it's a new basketball season, and with it comes the holiday tradition of playing the Cards in a regular season game. My long-time friend Seth is drooling with anticipation, as his Cards will likely mop the floor with this year's UK team in a way not seen in a long time. I've already told him that I expect UK to lose by 7 or 8 if we're lucky to keep it close, while more likely seeing the freshmen lose their cool and probably get beat by about 20-25.

So it's going to take something special for UK to pull off the incredible. So for this week's Friday Funnies, we'll dedicate it to Patrick Sparks, who gave UK one of the more ludicrous victories in the series' history. Not laugh-out-loud funny, but still pretty funny nonetheless. Go Cats.

My Derby Glass Project

Right around Kentucky Derby time this year, I took stock of one of my secret collections that I've been working on for as long as I can remember. It probably doesn't make much sense outside of the greater Louisville and Kentucky area, but if this is what will get me on an episode of Hoarders, at least it's better than a house of dead cats.

Since as long as I can remember, one of the guaranteed Christmas gifts I can count on receiving from my mother is the coming year's Kentucky Derby glass. These glasses may not appear much to the casual eye, but for those who care deeply about the greatest two minutes in sports, this is a central part of the event. While the proletariat get their mint juleps served in plastic Derby cups at the Downs, the bourgeois folks who spend top dollar for their tickets get them served in glasses.

The glasses each year feature a list of every Derby winner since the beginning of time. I'm sure at some point the glasses are going to have to become bigger in order to fit it all on there, but at least for now there is plenty of room to handle more names for a while.

Several years ago my mom didn't just give me the coming year's glass, but also gave me all of the glasses in her collection. So now I have a couple big plastic tubs carefully arranged with all my glasses inside. One day, when I'm rich and famous and grown up and I'm a doctor or an astronaut, I'll get a display case and show them all off, but I'm not ready yet (and I have nowhere in my house to hold it). I'm not quit prepared because now that I've taken stock of my collection, there are some gaps that need to be filled. I have a list now on my phone that I consult when at random antique stores or if I'm feeling bored and decide to shop online for some glasses at collector sites. I'm always trying to fill in the holes that way I have at least one copy (but preferably two copies) of each year. Most of the holes I have in the mid-80s and then a lot before 1974, so if you ever stumble upon some in a weird location, be sure to let me know. I'm always interested in gaining a new member of the collection and making it more complete.

Friday Funnies

Well, it's Christmas time, so I have to bring up some holiday classics that I love for the Friday Funnies. This time around, we're going with Scrooged. This is not the funniest clip from this movie, but since my mother has so lovingly declared this year to be the Campbell Family Christmas of Coal. Apparently gifts are strictly forbidden and we may well end up eating toast and rotten wine for dinner, I'm going to hold out hope that I get a VHS while my sister gets stuck with a towel. No, scratch that, I'll take the towel. Thanks mom! And happy holidays, everyone.

Friday Funnies

Been thinking about Newsradio a lot recently and I wish I could tell you why. Just been replaying scenes in my mind the last few weeks as I close out another course in school. It's been a busy nine weeks, as I am sure you may have noticed since I've pretty much been bare bones here on the ole blog. But good wordier, rantier times shall return soon. In the meantime, share a laugh with me and Jimmy James (the man so nice they named him twice) and his fancy plans with pants to match.

Game On: Week of Dec. 7

My recent column reviewing Far Cry 3 and The Walking Dead: Episode 5—No Time Left. Thanks to the Columbus (Ind.) Republic for publishing.

 

Game On: Week of Nov. 30

My recent column reviewing Hitman: Absolution and Call of Duty: Black Ops 2. Thanks to the Columbus (Ind.) Republic for publishing.

 

Friday Funnies

For whatever reason one of the movie channels has brought Chasing Amy back into the rotation, so of course I've watched it about 27 times. When you nail the opening scene of the movie, you got a good thing going. Black rage!

Friday Funnies

With my sister's birthday coming up, I thought it appropriate to honor her with a Friday Funnies via her doppelganger. Now, she probably doesn't know that my friends and I all think she looks like a younger Sarah Silverman, but we do. And when I talk to them about my sister, inevitably I get the, "Oh, you mean Sarah Silverman?" joke thrown back at me. So happy birthday (next week) to my wonderful sister, and hope she isn't too offended by Silverman's brand of comedy, which I love, to know that this comes from a place of brotherly love.



Oh, and my brother's birthday was last week, but I doubt he even knows I've had a blog for the past four years, let alone knows where to go to read it.

Game On: Week of Nov. 23

My recent column rounding up the launch day titles for the Wii U. Thanks to the Minneapolis Star-Tribune for publishing.

Game On: Week of Nov. 14

My recent column reviewing Assassin's Creed III and LittleBigPlanet Karting. Thanks to WPTV in Florida, the Minneapolis Star-Tribune, and the Detroit News for publishing.

 

Friday Funnies

Once again, it's time to get back into the swing of blogging. Always lots of thoughts, ramblings and sightings in my life, just hard to find the time to document them. Alas, a long weekend gives excellent opportunity to dive back in.

And I return with a holiday edition of Friday Funnies. No better way to celebrate Thanksgiving than via the Cosby family.

My Night of Deception

Tonight I get the pleasure of seeing one of my favorite people in person. Oddly, he's not super-famous or anything, just a guy who does card tricks, has a voice made for storytelling and flat-out seems to be a cool guy.

It's Ricky Jay, someone you're more likely familiar with from his small roles in Boogie Nights, State and Main, and a host of David Mamet films. I can't say when I first started liking the guy. I know Penn & Teller talked about him a few times and I've always been fans of theirs. But I did see this trick on a TV special a long time back and once he started popping up in movies that I already liked, I figured the guy had to be a cool cat to hang out with.



He's giving a talk tonight at the Folger on "Deception." I have a feeling I may not even see any card tricks, as cool as that would be. Maybe he'll just rant for a bit on things and it won't be anything that amazing. He even makes reciting old poems sound cool.



But I've always wanted to see the guy in person and I'm glad I'll be able to check this off the list. And if he happens to pull a deck of cards from his coat pocket, all the better for me.

Friday Funnies

Because ever since I saw this movie I don't think I can enter a steakhouse without checking the menu to see if they have something in line with the ol 96er. And the thought of eating a plate of gristle makes me want to vomit. But in a funny kind of way, much like getting "a bucket of salad." Just make sure you wrap a few Paul Bunyan hats for the kids, OK?



On a side note, hilarious that Annette Benning is in this movie, and I totally had a crush on the girl who gets stood up by the son in this clip. She was one of those classic '80s teen actresses whose name I never knew but who was the love interest in several flicks and you just couldn't help but fall for her.

Game On: Week of Oct. 26

My recent column reviewing NBA 2K13 and NBA Baller Beats. Just glad the wife wasn't around to watch me nearly shatter multiple bones in my body trying to play Baller Beats. It's a rough one, kids. And thanks to the North Jersey papers for publishing.

  

Game On: Week of Oct. 17

My recent column reviewing XCOM: Enemy Unknown and The Walking Dead: Episode 4 — Around Every Corner. Thanks to the Toledo Blade for publishing.

  

Friday Funnies

Sure, it was great reading about Obama calling out Romney as the "bullshitter" that he is. BUt to be honest, I like my president to be a little more crass. And lo and behold, we have audio proof. I never knew about Obama's audiobook version of his "Dreams of My Father." I didn't have much interest in reading it, and so I never paid much attention until a friend sent me a website that has a selection of choice clips.

Mind you, Obama is just reciting his book and the memories he recalls. But still, it's 100% badass listening to him talk like a street thug and bitching about ordering french fries.

President Obama is Tired of Your Shit

My Childhood Bastardized

And the hits keep on coming from Hollywood. They are continuing to dip into the well of my childhood (or near-childhood, at least) and take things that I remember and sometimes deeply appreciate and mock sad mockeries or interpretations out of them.

First up is Carrie. This movie doesn't come out until 2013, but let's be clear … it's already been out before. Sissy Spacek rocked the pig's blood dye job, and Travolta even has some appearances. Of course, it's much more remarkable for Piper Laurie's performance as Carrie's cracked-out mother, who makes freakouts over wire hangers look like an innocent bake sale. I like Chloe Moretz and I kinda hope this movie does OK, but I have so little faith in remakes these days that I have little hope for this one.



Next is Evil Dead. This may be the greatest movie of the year or the decade, but to me it's an abomination. Honestly, go the "kids trapped in a cabin that turns into a hellhole" storyline and just call it something else. And I don't give two shits that Sam Raimi is behind this retelling of his classic. There is just no reason to invoke the name and all that is holy with Ash and that character and that run of cult classics. Yes, I may be a little too passionate about Evil Dead, Evil Dead II and Army of Darkness, but that still doesn't stop this "remake" from appearing like a gory cashgrab.

Idiot of the Day

All I wanted to do was pick up a pizza.

Normally I am fine with letting parents do what they have to do to keep a kid entertained. My dog has a longer attention span than a young kid so I understand you gotta do whatever it takes to keep the kid from causing all holy hell and throw a tantrum of King Kong-level proportions.

What I cannot handle is a parent BECOMING a child in order to entertain a child, thus removing your reason for being, which is being a parent and keeping things chill.

Take this lady. I was picking up a pizza at my local pizza joint and while I waited for the pie to be boxed and so forth, I could hear this incessant banging of silverware on plates and tables. I turned to quietly scorn a small child with my hate eyes, when lo and behold it was the kid's damn mother. The kid didn't seem interested in whatever musical creations she was hammering out, but by golly she kept on going. She was doing her best Animal from the Muppets impersonation, while everyone else around her were either laughing at them or just hoping the check would arrive faster.

Friday Funnies

I delayed my normal posting of Friday Funnies because Twitter was abuzz yesterday with news that the delayed premiere of one of my favorite shows, Community, would not stop the cast from premiering ... something. Well, they came through. Damn you, NBC. Just keep Community around for #sixseasonsandamovie

Game On: Week of Oct. 12

My recent column reviewing Dishonored. Only one game in this column because it was so good I ran long. Thanks to the Minneapolis Star-Tribune for publishing.

Game On: Week of Oct. 5

My recent column reviewing FIFA 13 and Resident Evil 6. Thanks to the Detroit News and Toledo Blade for publishing.

 

Friday Funnies

Because a world with Adam Scott and Jon Hamm working together is a better world for us all. It's a fact.

My Night Down the Rabbit Hole

Sunday night was a treat. Sure, it would have been awesome to experience this with some friends, but everyone was busy so I had to ride solo in seeing one of my favorite bands, Frightened Rabbit, play at the Black Cat.

They've released a few new songs over the last year, a few of them quite good and several just kinda meh. But the Scottish band only makes it over to the US once a year, and they included DC in the nine-city tour so I had to make sure I didn't miss them.

The played just about everything I wanted to hear, but what made the concert so awesome was how they slightly altered the arrangement of songs we all knew well. Many upbeat songs were played more dulcet or muffled, and the inclusion of a new guitarist meant more jamming and feedback when certain songs did reach their crescendo.

If there was a downside to the night, it was the dickhead behind me who proudly (and drunkenly) proclaimed, "Fuck all y'all, I'm the obnoxious 'whoop' guy tonight" and proceeded to whoop after every damn song and sounded like jackass the entire night. Luckily I was able to maneuver a few people forward that way their ears were blasted by his annoying bullshit all night. This was capped by him singing every damn song off key and out of rhythm because of the before-mentioned changes in how the songs were played.

Nevertheless, he didn't spoil a thing for me. Of the three big highlights from the show, the first was a pared-down version of Backwards Walk, which Scott almost apologized for as if he was reliving a bad breakup with a girl in front of us and just needed to grind through that song. It was stellar, and the best rendition I've heard them do of it in the three concerts I've attended.



The second was the band playing a 6-song encore, which just normally isn't done anymore because bands and venues try to keep the time limit on shows to a hard line. And it's not like they were making up for a weak main set. By the tail end of the encore, Scott kept saying, "OK, really, just one more. You are all too fucking good tonight" as they dipped into earlier albums or plucked a favorite B side track that everyone still knew the words to.

The last highlight was the top-tier of concert highlights … the white whale of live shows … the double encore. They closed the encore with The Loneliness, which if you listen to the song below, ends with a great opportunity for crowd interaction.



They finished the song with all of us reciting that cheer, and they took their bows, left the stage and the house brought up the lights and started the house music to tell us all to go home. Well, instead of shuffling off most everyone stayed and kept on singing that chant. Over and over again.

About 5 minutes of this (and believe me, that chant isn't very long, so five sustained minutes of this was worthy of giving you goosebumps) and the band strolled back up for a tired, but always-excellent, final closer of Keep Yourself Warm. I've been to many concerts where fans try to entice the band into playing longer and 99% of them never do. When Scott and the guys came back onto the stage with fresh shots of whiskey poured, you just knew they were feeling it. We all were.

Friday Funnies

Tuesday was the 25th anniversary of "The Princess Bride" being released in theaters. I can't actually recall whether I saw this movie in the theaters or not. Problem is, I know I've seen it twice for special screening type things in high school and college, so those memories cloud the past.

Nevertheless, it's in the Campbell Pantheon of Favorite Movies ever, and it's one I can always stop and enjoy no matter what scene its own when I stumble across it.

It would have been easy to pick the duel or Wesley's last speech, but I figure there are a million worthy scenes, so I'll pick a more obscure one. This is Billy Crystal killing it as Miracle Max, and I always like it when he breaks character to talk about how thinly sliced the meat is.

Trailer Love

I know it's been awhile since I was on the blog. Believe me, it was hurting me more than it was hurting the 8 of you. This most recent class was a real test of skill and time management, so some things had to wait (like blogging, and my career move into synchronized horse dancing).

But hopefully I am back for a bit and ready to dive back into the thick of things. Having only seven posts in September is just bad form. You deserve better, audience of under a dozen.

First up, some recent movie trailers that have caught my attention.

This first one I had no idea even existed. Never heard any buzz or early talk of it, and that is rather rare. So color me surprised when I watched this red band trailer for the 43 Movie. Crazy stuff, and probably 100% ignorant but certain to make me laugh. Hell, the trailer alone got three good chortles out of me. Has the chance to tap into that Kentucky Fried Movie sensibility that all those Scary Movie hackjobs could only dream of touching. OK, perhaps my expectations are a bit high.



Next up is Promised Land. Let's not play games, we live in a world where all things being equal, you put talented people in front of and behind a camera and make some kind of movie about environmental issues, and there is a damn good chance I am going to watch it. This my heroin. Damn you, heroin.



Identity Thief last up for this edition. The premise sounded really juvenile and an easy cash grab for the stars, but then I watched the trailer and my hopes were raised. There may not be much new in this movie that we haven't seen in other places, but damnit whoever cut this trailer did a fine job.

Game On: Week of Sept. 28

My recent column reviewing Borderlands 2 and Little Big Planet Vita. Thanks to the Evansville Courier & Press and the Detroit News for publishing.

 

Game On: Week of Sept. 21

My recent column reviewing NHL 13 and Double Dragon Neon. Thanks to the Evansville Courier & Press for publishing.

  

Game On: Week of Sept. 14

My recent column reviewing Mark of the Ninja and Way of the Samurai 4. Thanks to the Evansville Courier & Press for publishing.

  

Trailer Love

I'm always intrigued by a good conspiracy theory. Heck, I even created one from whole cloth for our fantasy football league that we still reference to this day six years later. The Kennedy assassination, the Matrix, Roswell, the Pentaverate, (Ok, so two of those are fictional) and others always pique my interest. I would not say that I believe in them so much as I just love watching and reading about them and seeing where they germinate and how they gain a life of their own.

The Conspiracy is a movie posing as a documentary, so it's not really to be trusted (much like a Dan Brown novel). Nevertheless, I like the position this one takes and I think the trailer is cut well to get you  wanting to see more.

My Goodness, Girl

I got no problem with women trying out for men's football teams and playing. Hey, if they can run, kick and throw better than a guy in their position, then let the best player win.

On the other hand, this all-female/strip show football league seems a little too on the other end of the spectrum. I'm not saying these women aren't athletes, but don't tell me it's all about the sport here, because those "uniforms" tell me otherwise.

But that won't stop me from enjoying one girl trucking another. Good stuff.

Friday Funnies

I love a good "go fuck yourself" speech. If nothing else, because I'll probably never have the opportunity to give a full-throated one myself. I'm left to ginning up a situation beyond measure just to casually throw it in there, and it never comes off well. Lots of websites have been sharing clips of Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Joaquin Phoenix since "The Master" is being released this weekend. This scene from Charlie Wilson's War is among one of Hoffman's best. I could have take something from any number of PSH flicks like Almost Famous and Boogie Nights, but this one I always enjoyed, especially looking back knowing that he's bitching out Roger Sterling.

Game On: Week of Sept. 7

My recent column reviewing The Walking Dead: Episode 3 — The Long Road Ahead and Counter-Strike: Global Offensive. Thanks to the North Jersey papers and the Evansville Courier & Press for publishing.

 

Idiot of the Day

Ignore, if you will, that something called the Energy Kitchen is opening nearby my office. Oh no, ignore it you must. Because what is truly important is the business it is replacing. For I should say, if you are a restaurant, ANY restaurant, that dares serve authentic Asian family members to your guests, you probably shouldn't be in business. 

And you are certainly an idiot for keeping that sign and never having it fixed.

Friday Funnies

This used to be the kind of thing that Kelly would make fun of me for, even if were not for the fact that he has fully become just like me. I was mocked relentlessly for my adherence to the almighty Mac. I watched as he bought more and more Android or whatever the hell Samsung/Nokia products that were out there and hated every single one of them. But once he got his iPhone (and his iPad and his fourth Apple computer) I knew he was turned to the Dark Side. And it was awesome.

But that won't stop me from stepping back and realizing that this sketch is pretty much right on target with how I was rolling when I first couple versions of the iPhone came out.

Game On: Week of Aug. 30

My recent column reviewing Madden NFL 13 and Transformers: Fall of Cybertron. Thanks to the Evansville Courier & Press and the north Jersey papers for publishing.

  

Trailer Love

It's been awhile since I loved on some movie trailers. So let's bring back this long-running series with a trailer I stumbled upon the other day.

I'm not really one for "road trip" movies. After having gone to the mountaintop with National Lampoon's Vacation, it's somewhat difficult to imagine anything ever coming close to Clark and Rusty sharing a beer in the desert after giving Audrey her period. Alas, some fine British folk have taken a decidedly alternate take on the road trip movie. I don't want to give anything away because I think watching the trailer says it all.

It looks weird, but it also looks like it could be a lot of fun, in a Shallow Grave kind of way.

Friday Funnies

It's been the week of fantasy football drafts. I've had two this week and one more tomorrow, and throw in a couple survivor and pick em leagues and I've got a full slate of football entertainment coming to me for the next 6 months. Which is good, since UK basketball doesn't start for a few more months and we all know how complete shite the football team is.

So in honor of all my football happiness (both real and make believe), this week's Friday Funnies is brought to you by a guy who wants to kill your bookie and mine.

Game On: Week of Aug. 24

My recent column reviewing Sound Shapes and Hybrid. Thanks to the Evansville Courier & Press and the North Jersey newspapers for publishing.

Friday Funnies

The fellas start rolling in today for our league's fantasy football draft. Yes, we're all grownups and this is how we escape our regular lives. Get over it. Plus, as a bonus, we gamble as well. And that makes everything just a bit sweeter and more enjoyable. To honor our ninth season, let's cheer ourselves on with some cheerleaders. Funny ones, that is.

My Damn Deer

One of the trials of living in Takoma Park is dealing with wildlife. In just three years of living here, we have (on continual occasions) seen squirrels, raccoons, mice, deer and foxes traipsing through our yard.

Drives me nuts. Because let's be honest, Kelly may call my neighborhood Middle-Earth because he can't imagine anyone going more than five blocks for anything in the city, but it's not like I live in pure farmland. I actually live closer to a Metro station than any of my friends (except Douglass) so it's insane that I have to listen to raccoons fighting with the foxes at night over who gets to setup shop in my backyard (hint: the raccoons won and the foxes now live about six houses down).

These damn deer are just up to no good. We had to build a makeshift deer fence (OK, the wife's cousin made it ... he's smart like that) just to keep the damn things from treating our garden like the Blue Boar buffet line. Just the other week, the wife's uncle and aunt came to DC for a visit and I showed him this video that I took a couple days prior in our backyard.



I'm just glad I didn't become this guy. See, the damn deer doesn't give a shit about me walking about 11 feet away from it. It's Honey Badger Deer for all I know. I showed him that video, and his eyes lit up. Her uncle's an avid hunter. He may be a board-certified spinal surgeon during the day, but by golly he saw that deer on the video and said, "Hell at that range I wouldn't even need to use bullets. I could just beat it death with barrel." I think he is exploring real estate options in our neighborhood as we speak.

Game On: Week of Aug. 17

My recent column reviewing Sleeping Dogs and New Super Mario Bros. 2. Thanks to the Evansville Courier & Press and North Jersey papers for publishing.

 

What I've Read: Stay Close

If there is one negative to being in school for a year, it means I have a ton of reading to do each week that isn't exactly what one would call fun. Sure, it's fun because I'm utilizing those brain cells and growing my skillset, but it's such technical reading that there isn't a way to explain how exciting and interesting this stuff is without coming across as a total nerd.

It also means that when I do pick up a book for personal, relaxing reading, it takes about eight weeks longer to read it because I just can't make the time for it. My usual daily train reading gets overrun by class reading. Just not a lot of time for escape reading, even if my version of escapism tends to be nonfiction or documentary films. Damn, I am a dork.

While it took me much longer than it ever should have, I was able to read Harlan Coben's latest. And while the cover looks innocent enough, the subtle break in the fence should warn you that things in suburban New Jersey are once again in a state of "oh, shit." In this edition, a soccer mom gets her world rocked when she (rather stupidly) decides to tread back into her former life that she once abandoned for greener pastures. She can't quite let it go, and it comes back to bite her in the ass when people start dying around her (or being tortured) and she can't quite understand why and by whom. Throw in the ex-lover that always has to reappear and some creepy killer types, and it's a fun read. I was surprised by the limited number of characters in this novel because normally Coben throws a lot of characters at you and does some festive crossover of other novels he has written. But in Stay Close he keeps it simple and that allows him to dive a bit deeper into some of the characters and when things get super-personal later on, it gives it a bit more weight when normally you gloss over some certain events.

After he took some time to develop a more teen-centered novel (clearly trying to being the Twilight type crowd into his brand of novels), I'm glad he's returned to his more adult-themed stuff because I don't know that I was ever going to follow him down the road of Myron Bolitar's nephew. Of course, if this means Bolitar himself isn't returning anytime soon, I'll be definitely disappointed.

Friday Funnies

In honor of Kelly's birthday, I'm going to dedicate this week's Friday Funnies to him. And our video treat is something I'm sure he'll co-sign and spend another hour finding like-minded videos.

It's monkeys that get drunk. Fantastic.

My Night With An Addiction

Celebrating Kelly's birthday today, as he inches one step closer to old man status. What better way to forget worrying about the future than reliving the past. A bunch of us are checking out Jane's Addiction tonight in Baltimore. One of the staples of my formative younger years, here's to hoping that they've aged well and still bring it.

Game On: Week of Aug. 10

My recent column reviewing Wreckateer and London 2012. Thanks to the Evansville Courier & Press for  publishing.

 

Idiot of the Day

Just so you know, I wasn't crazy when I pointed out this guy last week. See, he's back at it again. I can't escape his insanity. Although I did respect the fact that later on in the ride he actually leaned up against the door of the train. Just him and his sudoku, trying his damndest to not touch anything, but in a natural twist it means he instead bumped into everything but the third rail.

Friday Funnies

I refuse to acknowledge the E! channel except for the fact that it brings me The Soup every week. And you all know me, I love me some Joel McHale. Between this show and Community, he's becoming my man crush. Here are a collection of clips showing you why the The Secret Life of the American Teenager is a horrible yet comedy-filled goldmine.

Game On: Week of August 3

My recent column reviewing Kingdom Hearts 3D: Dream Drop Distance and Test Drive: Ferrari Legends. Thanks to the NJ Herald and The Stark County Press-News for publishing.

 

Game On: Week of July 27

My recent column reviewing The Walking Dead: Episode 2 — Starving for Help and The Amazing Spider-Man. Thanks to the Evansville Courier & Press for publishing.

 

Game On: Week of July 20

Clearing out the backlog, here is my column reviewing NCAA Football 13 and Spec Ops: The Line.

 

Idiot of the Day

Oh yeah, I love you all that much I'm bringing you another post today.

This idiot has been on my radar for some time now. As a 12-year resident of DC, I'd like to think I've seen all manner of Metro rail passengers. The sleepers, the talkers, the singers, the panhandlers, the almost-nekked, etc. This guy dipped into the rarified realm of being an adult acting like a child.

Many children, especially those of tourist parents, will do what he did when riding the train. They'll stand and avoid holding any of the rails or handles and attempt to ride the train like it's a surfboard. Makes no sense, and 90% of the time they end up banging into a rail, or worse, crashing into someone minding their own business because like anything in life, the Metro trains are completely unpredictable. Drivers ride the breaks like a speed addict, and there are subtle tilts and shifts in the way the trains ride the rails (or don't ride the rails depending on your view of the cluster-eff that is Metro).

Anyway, as I've said, this guy likes to act like a child and not brace himself at any point during his ride. Maybe he's like a Murray or Nicholson character, but that's not a worthy excuse, because if you are that fearful of contracting plague, best thing to do is not board a metal tube of potential sick. But that didn't stop him from being an idiot, constantly bopping around and smacking into both rails, train car walls and people. It was ridiculous if not for its hilarity since this was a grown man acting the fool than for the other passengers who watched this dipshit also try to work his Blackberry while this was all happening. It was horrible. He is an idiot. Can't wait to see him again next week.

Friday Funnies

I know it's been a while since I was actively posting, but trust me I am back and have plenty to share.

First up, some Friday Funnies, always a good time for you readers.

In this edition, it's all about getting geeky with some Star Wars stuff. But this is really good, believe me. What happened is some genius with a computer, a solid DVD collection and some free time culled together some choice quotes from James Earl Jones' blaxploitation films and dubbed them into his Darth Vader role in Star Wars.

Absolute. Genius. I almost shed tears in laughter at a few of these moments. Enjoy.

Friday Funnies

Last weekend the movie channels were replaying an old favorite, Made. This was the pseudo-sequel to Swingers and starred Favreau and Vaughn as bumbling gophers for a small-time crime family. I can't claim that the film was a piece of cinematic genius, but it included lots of great back-and-forth between the two of them, and Vaughn has a few scenes to really shine in. Including this one when he gets to fly first class for the first time.

Game On Column: Week of July 13

My recent column reviewing Theatrhythm: Final Fantasy and Gravity Rush. Thanks to the Evansville Courier & Press and the Minneapolis Star-Tribune for publishing.

   

 

My Hiatus Apologies

Just wanted to let everyone know that I haven't disappeared. Blogspot has been having troubles and making it impossible to make posts lately. Getting lots of error messages and whatnot. Seems like they may have everything figured out so hopefully I'll get more posts up soon.

Game On: Week of July 6

My recent column reviewing Lollipop Chainsaw and LEGO Batman 2: DC Super Heroes. Thanks to the Minneapolis Star-Tribune and NJ Herald for publishing.

  

Friday Funnies

I love the Olympics. The wife and I have been spending much of the last two weeks watching the Olympic trials, getting to know names and faces of athletes so we know who to cheer for in a few weeks when the London Games begin. Get me random athletes competing in even more random sports all for the love of country, and I'm sold. And as many of my friends know, I have a not-so-secret desire to quit everything and become the next great Olympic curler for the United States. Or any country for that matter. Hell, I'll join any nation that wants to channel this passion and let me become a curler. Sign me up, Zimbabwe!

I can at least say that I would try harder and put forth a better effort than this jackass. I vacillated over whether to make this an Idiot of the Day post, but I found myself laughing more than facepalming. With that, I bestow upon you the joy that is the lest competent hurdler ever. If they picked a drunken cat from the crowd I think it would have fared better.

Game On Column: Week of June 28

Here is my recent column, reviewing Inversion and Resistance: Burning Skies. Thanks to the Detroit News and Minneapolis Star-Tribune for publishing.